Neal and Cleon strike back: the sequel
by Faeriegurl
Summary: everyone remember Neal and Cleon's helpful pickup lines? well, Neal bounces back on his feet and pulls Cleon up with him( Cleon has to look in the dictionary to figure out how to defend himself, but alas, it isn't fair to leave him all beat up...)
1. Neal and Cleon's helpful pick up lines

  
  


  
  


Kay, I wrote this from Neal's point of view. I WROTE IT JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT, So Diss it or dig it, please R/R. 

  
  
  
  


~* Neal & Cleon's helpful pick up line

  
  
  
  


Now, as many of you may know, it is not always easy snagging yourself a girlfriend. Cleon and I being pro flirters, we have decided to provide a detailed account of our best lady lines, and give their answers. Read it soon, before Kel destroys it. 

  
  


1. Neal: I know how to please a woman.

Uline: Then please leave me alone.

  
  


2. Cleon: My darling pearl, let me give myself to you!

Girl: I don't accept cheap gifts.

  
  


3. Neal: I can tell that you want me.

Girl: Yeah, I want you to leave.

  
  


4. Cleon: You look like a Dream.

Girl: Go back to sleep.

  
  


5. Neal: May I have this last dance?

Girl: You've just had it.

  
  


6. Cleon: My fairest dove, your body is like a temple.

Girl: sorry, there are no services today. The only time we're open is in your dreams.

  
  


7. Neal: Haven't I seen you some place before?

Girl: Yeah. That's why I never go there anymore.

  
  


8. Cleon: What is it like being the most beautiful girl at the ball? 

Girl: What's it like being the biggest liar at the ball?

  
  



	2. Neal and Cleon strike back

  
  


Hey everybody!! This is my sequel to Neal and Cleon's pickup lines. First of all, I want everyone to know that I mean no insult to women . I mean, I'm one myself, so this is done purely for the art of humor. But I thought it was unfair to leave Neal and Cleon down on their luck, so I helped them bounce back on their feet. Don't kill me!!!! Enjoy!!!!!!   
  


*** Neal and Cleon strike back---- how to put Uline and her friends in place***   
  
  
  


Cleon: My darling dove, your body is like a temple. 

Girl: sorry, there are no services open today. Only in your dreams. 

Neal: Here's a donation to help restore the exterior.   
  
  
  


Cleon: You look like a dream. 

Girl: Go back to sleep. 

Neal: You mean this isn't a nightmare?   
  


Cleon: My darling, let me give myself to you! 

Girl: Sorry, I don't except cheap gifts. 

Neal: Oh, just cheap perfume then? 

Neal: Haven't I seen you somewhere before? 

Girl: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore. 

Neal: Yeah, I guess you did look a little out of place in the mens bathroom.   
  


Neal: I can tell you want me. 

Girl: Yeah, I want you to leave 

Neal: You thought we were going to do it here? 

Neal: What's it like being the most beautiful girl at the ball? 

Girl: What's it like being the biggest liar at the ball? 

Neal: Your right. I was lying.   
  


Neal: Is this seat empty? 

Girl: It will be if you sit down. 

Neal: (yelling) Hey Uline, there's two over here!   
  
  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
  


Haha. Not as good as my first one, but good enough I suppose. Coming soon, the final chapter: Neal and Cleon apologize for their dastardly bad lines to women.   
  



	3. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Author's note: In this chapter, Neal and Cleon apologize for their dastardly comments toward women. Well, Cleon needed a little help from Neal ( honestly, Cleon is the sort of guy that would get locked in the grocery store and starve to death.) These comments aren't as good as my first two, but sequels are never good. So here it is-------

  
  
  
  


~*~ Neal and Cleon apologize: the final chapter ~*~

  
  


Neal: Would you like to nail me to the wall now, or later?

  
  


Cleon : If I died, would that make you happy * bursts into tears*

  
  


Neal: Have you talked to my mother? She feels the same way about me.

Cleon : Does this mean you don't think I'm perfect?

Neal: I didn't do it, and I'll never do it again.

  
  


Neal: Wow. This mistake is so obvious, I can't believe I missed it. It's like a sumo wrestler at an anorexia clinic. 

  
  


Cleon : I'm an idiot. I'm stupid. I want to die. How could I dishonor you like that? I'm not worthy of living anymore. Cast me from Tortall.

Girl: Uh, there's nothing left for me to say.

  
  
  
  


Neal: You know, you are very, very sexy when your face screws up like that.

  
  
  
  
  
  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~


End file.
